Noblesse oblige

In the kitchen, in NewNewWork (but let us now say about NewWork, as wow, and all, actually, let’s not) and there are doughnuts (and gravy rings, too, coincidently) on the table. No idea whose birthday it was, but there they were. Several of the geeks (along with me, the non-geek) were hanging around, as we are wont to do, drinking our tea and not being at our desks. Because we need space to think, and I find doing that beside a place where there are free carb-heavy niceties is most salubrious. In walks one of the chicks from the other side of the office. Conversation, obviously, ensues:

her Oh, lovely, bakery goodness! Oh, wait, can’t do that. Think of the carb count
me Ack, go on, tis Friday, wee treat
her Oh, no, I best not. I have half a sandwich in the fridge.
me What, half a lettuce sandwich?
her What?

Luckily, at this point, she didn’t understand what I was saying. Unluckily, I had to repeat it several times until she got it. Those assembled geeks thought this rather cheeky. It wasn’t, really. But again, I got misunderstood. Due to my accent. This happened again at the weekend, while we were away. While Cassandra and I were asked if we were an item. No, that wasn’t said while my evidently incoherent speech was being analysed. That happened while we were away. You get the drift. Anyhow, the dude that made the connection betwixt Cassandra and I had to translate for another girl. Hohum. Apparently I should slow down and elongate my vowels. Like they do round these parts. And, apparently, according (this time) to Cassandra, I shouldn’t be so harsh. This conversation goes like:

dude Have a handout with lots of, seemingly, value-neutral statements. Now, does any of that provoke thoughts? For discussion? Anyone disagree with any of it? Does it push any buttons?
me, opening the discussion Well now, pretty much everything there pushes my buttons. Where to start? The inherent assumptions of soft-left politics, the subjugation of any personal thought…
Cassandra, with a mild dig in the ribs Now, now, don’t be harsh.

Turns out dude did try to construct the piece value-neutral, but we all know this is impossible. Plus, he found it funny to be called establishment. Oh, so one more snippet, but I leave out the dude-translated-for-her section

me, providing some background on me Well, y’see, some might see me as something of a traditionalist.
her Oh now, we see you as many things, but certainly not that.

Lastly, not a conversation per se, but probably what The Kids would class as one:

1.30am, via SMS Does this thing work?
me Hmm, how odd. That doesn’t show me the name of who sent it. So it must be a new number. Nope, don’t recognise the code. Oop North, perhaps? The midlands? Mayhaps when I have the intertubes again I shall find out. In the meantime, I shall respond. Of course, it could be spam. But I have only ever had one spam SMS in the many years I have had (the same) mobile phonery.
Time passes, the interwebs are available to me again Aha! Boy, yes, brane the size of a planet. But I don’t carry international dialing codes around in my head. If I did, I would have responded most differently.

No, wait, not quite lastly, as there is something else. We have now moved. All is done. In a burst of wisdom, we decided to do it ourselves. Hire a van, move the furniture, everything. And we did. Cassandra and I humping all the heavy items from one end of the village t’other. But it is done now. All is handed over.

Now, srsly lastly this time, there is the whole freecycle schlang. A good idea. And we had several bits and bobs to get shot of. All in good nick, too. 25” TV, storage chests, dresser, and on and on. All gets allocated quickly, but my caveat was that it had to be collected by Saturday, as we were away. And finishing moving. Very busy. This gave four days for people to arrive and collect. Two people did. Everything else, in perfect order, had to go to the skip. A divan bed. Chests of drawers. Such a shame. But, as Cassandra pointed out, we got the use of them, so it is a shame more than a waste. See, people seem to think you owe them something if you are giving it away. Sorry, I am doing you a favour. But it was still a waste. Though if I think of it like in a posh restaurant, you know, you don’t have to feel the need to finish it just because you are paying for it. If you enjoyed what you had, are contented, then that is worth the money.

I digress. And finish.

The concept of the concept