Shoplifting in your thirties

Posted Tue 21 Nov
2 comments so far

There is something great about wandering around town in the dark and cold. Still a lot of people about, milling and thronging, or whatever it is they do. Leaves blowing down the narrow Cambridge streets, heavy perfume from the girls on their way places, places that will become dim and featureless as they get older, the exuberance of this moment lost forever.

I hate to turn this into another band post, but I gotta thread our singer-less-ness into it somehow.

At some random point in time, probably in the past, I would walk round and note the amount of time I could say Hellllloooooo Nurse, or, given the first line of this post Dear God, woman, you’ll have someone’s eye out with those. But alas, no longer. Now I just wonder if they can sing. How hard can it be, eh? Surely there are girls (sorry, women) who can sing and want to be in a band with us? Oh, right, I realise now.

Against the Day, but, alas, against my bank balance too. A hefty tome it is. I picked it up in awe in Borders.

Also wandering around town, it tends to dampen my enthusiasm for wanting to work in academia. All those filing cabinets and faded whitewash walls. Sure, the colleges are lovely buildings, but somehow the offices tarnish the ideal of it I have. All this knowledge I have in my head is useless, really. Obscure and arcane, I guess my life course is set now, no matter how much I wish to pour tea over the tiller. Let me ask you, where do the children play?

But I don’t believe in such course-set-in-stone-ness. It is just there isn’t much else I can do. Some would argue that I can’t even do what I purport to do, but hey, I have bluffed this long and no one has noticed. I keep thinking if I keep my head down, read some more, maybe at some point I will be clever enough to scam a job that pays shedloads. That, or I hold out for a record deal. I know it is all about being happy, and money can’t buy you that, but it keeps a roof over our heads and my children in all their activities. Don’t take that I amn’t happy, as despite being an obsessive-depressive (with no obsessions and nothing to be depressed about), I can’t complain. No, seriously, I mean that literally. I can’t. It is all about meaning, hidden, inferred and intended.

What is lost is lost, I said, she just works for me, doing things that you can’t do.

A plug here at the end: Sign Ganesh’s petition!

  1. the children play in the aisles of asda just in front of me, when i am carrying something really heavy, thats also where they scream, cry, wet themselves and “bump into” my knee or basket. Or was this a cat stevens thing?
    Sending you finding a singer type vibes.
    I love shopping when its dark out, its one of the things that makes up for overheated shops and huge queues in christmas shopping.

    Wed 22 Nov, 7:11PM

  2. Good-girl-turned-bad Britney Spears has topped an eclectic list of the net’s most popular searches
    n the run-up to Christmas. The popstar,who hit the headlines last week for stepping out
    “commando” with her new best friend Paris Hilton,has helped revealed exactly what the internet
    savvy are looking for from their stars - the thick and the dead.

    Thu 21 Dec, 10:53AM

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